Choosing our Hawaiian Weddng
🌺August 28, 2023🌺
We Got Fianced
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Two Strikes and Out....Redemption's for Suckers
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Sadly, we knew that his days on the road were numbered. I'm about 90% sure that he should not have legally been allowed to drive on the road the very last summer that I ever drove him. There was that air conditioning problem that I had mentioned, but he also really struggled going in reverse; and this was on a leveled surface. So this means that it was nearly impossible to go in reverse up an incline, making me increasingly more cautious not to drive into a downhill driveway or unfamiliar area in the off chance that I needed to reverse uphill out of it.
(Sayonara San Francisco driving)
After a call to my dad, I found out he was take to truck heaven in the form of scrap metal. Though I knew this day would come, I just figured I'd get at least one last drive around the block with him. Perhaps a ghost ride drive around the street, for safety purposes...
This assumption is why my heart dropped to my stomach when I came home to find only the remnants of a sad little oil leak in the place of my beloved Thomas.
Strike 1.
So, freshly coming off of yet another disappointment, I figured, if there was any way to make up for the broken SF plans and now my absent truck baby, it was going to be Gunther's Cookies!! Earlier in the day my mom had offered to be the one to go get the cookies, but I wanted to give the euros the experience of a true Californian hometown cafe.
We were off. 🚔
I quickly checked to see the fastest way to Gunthers so that we wouldn't hit any commuter traffic on the way...thennn my heart dropped for a second time.
CLOSED.
"YOU'VE GOTTA BE KIDDING ME"
I couldn't believe it. I completely forgot that Gunther's closing hours were earlier in the day than other cafes. This was completely my fault; these cookies were supposed to be the make all good all magical cookies. They were supposed to wash out any San Francisco moment that didn't go as planned and to make it The Best Thing Evarrrr!!! And worse, there was the chance that we could have gotten the cookies because my mom had offered to go get the cookies, and I told her no. I was a mess.
There's No Crying in a Whole Foods
Tears came streaming down my face as the pounds of frustration, disappointment and self judgement all came at me like a heavy brick wall. I tried hiding my beat red face as Gilles calmly helped to find a plan B to our dessert escapade.
It's crazy how the dying need for perfection can absolutely debilitate any chance of living in peaceful happiness. The pressures we put on ourselves to be more than what we are, only gets in the way of actually being our best selves.
It's the moments where we feel we are not enough, are the moments we must love ourselves the most.
Yes it is good to push for more; to strive for a better, work to be at the top; but when it gets in the way of allowing you to be happy with the moment at hand, then we have a problem.
This perfectionist phenomenon is exactly what I allowed to get in my way of an opportunity to show off my hometown with love and excitement. As we stopped by our local Whole Foods to find some dessert stand- ins, I allowed my tears to turn into sobs as I hid in a lone canned food aisle.
I just felt small.
Kind of silly to think about because at the end of the day, my disappointment stemmed from the fact that our guests weren't jumping for joy looking to buy San Franciscan apartments while stuffing their faces with "The Best Cookies I've ever had in my Life" desserts.
It's good to hope and plan for something epic, but it's important to accept and celebrate the moments exactly as they come. A philosophy that my lovely fiancé reminded me of when finding me between bean selections.
To Love and to be Loved for exactly who you are
Secret's Out
So Gilles and I have technically have been married since May of 2022! While we had quite literally Continents of options to choose from for our venue, we figured that if we landed somewhere in North America, there'd be a high chance that we'd have to fill out some serious amounts of paperwork. Looking deeper, we found that according to the United States Citizenship and Immigration Services, "If you are a U.S. citizen who wants to bring your foreign fiancé to the United States in order to get married, you need to file a Form I- 129F, Petition for Alien Fiancé."🖖🏽
mm wait sorry what? Alien Fiancé?
Yes, "Alien Fiancé Visa; this is a real- ass thing. Apparently I have officially been fiance-ed to an Alien for 13 months)
We learned that the paperwork and processing time of getting said visa for my sweet Alien would take a Year to a Year and a half minimum to complete.
So we decided that no matter the location of the wedding, we'd sign the official marriage license in Luxi- town...
* Que giddy pogo jumps as I'll use any excuse for a cute outfit and shoes*
We started thinking of every country we've ever visited together when choosing our "Yes Spot."
Big mistake as we are in fact an inter-continental couple who have Only lived in different countries for the past five years; so the search started in a pretty broad spectrum. Early on we considered places in the South of France thinking it could be fun to take over a chalet for the weekend. Then the search went up North as it'd be closer to Luxembourg allowing a larger party to rage with. We then briefly flamenco-ed our way to Spain because, you know I had recently watched a romcom that took place in Ibiza and thought we could just take over the set for our wedding, then soprano-ed to the Almafi Coast in Italy, jumped oceans to Lake Tahoe, California, flew down to San Diego, went back over the sea to touch down in Germany. Yet with all of these places to choose from, nothing really grabbed our attention in venues and places.
We had talked about wedding locations previously as we both knew that we had found our person once disregarding the whole thousands-of-miles-distance thing and finally commited to eachother's future. Back then, I could imagine getting married in multiple scenarios: in a church, on top of a mountain, on the beach in Greece, in the snow during a polite snow storm- but like the kind of snow storm that's flowy and graceful but doesn't leave you wet and cold, and the last scenario being in Hawaii.
The Packing Factor
I have a fare amount of "things" in my apartment. I'll be honest, packing up this apartment within the Hours that the country gave us to set up shop for this "two- week" lockdown, was damn near impossible. Moving out of this place is a multiple-day type of event. Let me explain it like this: There are two types of players that live overseas. The Nomad, and The Nester. The Nomad player is one that comes with a temporary mindset. Simplicity is their name of the game because as long as they have a bed to sleep in with a roof over their head, they're happy. Usually homed- good purchases are held off for this Nomad's post- playing lifetime. They are able to accept the fact that they will just be "taking up space" in an apartment for 9 months, knowing that it is a temporary place of residency. The Nomad usually lives exclusively off of those two suitcases that were checked in by the flight crew. No need for anything else.
Efficient mindset✔️
Low maintenance✔️
Simple living✔️
Okay but really Linds, what are you doing over there?
Purycard Dreams
Your quarantined home away from home
We always end with a massive finisher that usually encompasses a mix of Zuu workouts. I love these finishers because it's physically so taxing that it hits you mentally. The distraction of fatigue, I think, brings out your best as it pushes you to overcome the pain. All of a sudden, your thoughts grow into fierce motivation. Your mind wants you to overcome the challenge; it wants you to finish out and succeed!...probably because it just wants you to be done.😂
I think that this is the perfect time to go through that type of mental exercise. We all could practice this type of encouragement in our heads. Moments that are hard, moments that hurt. Yet moments that we will overcome. Isn't that what we all need to hear during this time?
Quarantine Fam
Our little quarantine family would have occasional movie nights and dinner parties together. Dinners at Kim and Simon's meant exposure to Vegan cuisine! I'm not gunna lie to you, the meals are delicious. Within the group there are two pescatarians, one vegan, another vegan-transition-er and two meat eaters. So the meals dispersed between this family is pretty eclectic. It's good though, it gives us all the chance to exercise our culinary skills. Something I personally love as I am still desperately trying to make up for the year of pureed dinners in my exhausting first season in German. Our first dinner at the Puerto Rican household with Ray and Jessie turned into a full on karaoke night! Some players bring their favorite clothes, others may pack their favorite snacks, but Ray, my sweet spirit animal Ray, had brought from home, her dear karaoke microphone. Thattagirl.
The night started with a calm jam sesh with her husband Jessie playing guitar, but quickly progressed to singing disney musicals on the karaoke screen. We were there for a good two hours, and actually singing the majority of the songs in french! Well, in our best french.
We really tried to give our best during this quarantine time. Whether it was dinner parties or karaoke nights, movie nights or picnic potlucks in the backyard. We did it all.
As the time went on though, we started to get a little more sporadic with the workouts. I've been switching up my days of exercise between these backyard "strength" workouts, with a day of running for cardio, aaaand yoga! I've noticed that changing up my workouts daily has allowed me to stay motivated, heck even excited to get out and do something. I usually just despise running. You couldn't catch me on the side of a road trekking along if my life depended on it. But our strength coach was all about cardio so I've been trying to keep it up. I will say that there really is something different about running when you're doing it in the South of France. When I started to add running into the mix it was, well, ugly. But I did it! I mapped out the same route that I decided to be my route every time. Then on one beautifully sunny day, I decided to turn right instead of the usual left. I don't know if it was the Missy Elliot melody bumpin' in my ears or a change in the winds, but it brought me a couple miles further into a scenery so beautiful that I swear it was fake!! I was surrounded by twelve different shades of green with vineyards on my left and luscious crops on my right. I even turned Missy off just to listen to the wind dancing with the trees. It was liberating getting to see that this run had transformed into a moment of adventure. I couldn't believe that this world was in our backyard all this time.
It was from then on that I committed myself to use these runs as an opportunity to really live in the moment, mindlessly. Our world is beautiful, we just gotta allow ourselves the moments to cherish it.
Lessons Learned
When you're so used to going through your day to day schedule, you forget to set aside time to explore.
When we're in season, our minds are so tightly wrapped around a different set of priorities. Priorities that take control of our minds, our bodies, our spirit.😂 (pause for teeny tiny violin playing for undeserved pity) But it's true, when we're not at trainings, workouts, meetings, or physio, we just want to rest. It literally comes down to "Do I want to take myself on a walk, or do I want to take nap." ...LET ME TELL YA, The nap, wins 9 times out of 10. 90% success rate. That walk doesn't even stand a chance.
It got to a point that I would go months without ever pulling my bedroom shade up to see the outside world. I wanted it to be an absolute black-out whenever I walked into that room. Because that room meant one of two things: Naptime, and Bedtime. I was too tired to experience what was on the other side of the shade because I was just trying to keep my body together to get through the season. Crazy to think because look what I missed out on!!? (Granted it was a lot more rainy during the season; this is Peak springtime views)
I'm trying to break the habit of staying up late so that I can rise with the sun in the early morning. I've noticed that this is the most peaceful part of the day; the calmness of our European morning mirrors the quietness of my family's California night. It's a moment where I feel connected.
I want to be a Yogi
As I've mentioned before, yoga has played a huge factor in caring for my mind, body and spirit during this time. I've always loved yoga ever since I started working for Lululemon after my Philippines season and before my German season. We're lucky to live in a day in age where a novice like myself can access classes online or through social media. (Thank you Chelsey Lowe) My 6 man team is sponsored by SOHO YOGA and they have generously given us players a free subscription to online classes as well! (Thank you Nikki Jagd) All of this exposure mixed in with the free time to really figure out my own practice has inspired me to dive into this way of life. Now I have a feeling that it is pretty unconventional and damn near impossible to get certified online, but I have decided that when this is all over, I want to get certified to be a yoga instructor!
I've realized that the more I learn, the more I don't know, which makes me
want to learn even more!! you follow?? There's just such a powerful energy that consumes me when I'm either practicing yoga, meditating, reflecting, dancing, all the things! It gives me peace. And that is something that I hope to create more of.
For years I had just practiced on my own with whomever was on the other side of the computer, but this quarantine has allowed me to spread my love to the people that I love. One way that Gilles and I stay connected during this time is through yoga on Facetime! The more classes I took, the more I wanted to practice running my own flow with someone. Gilles, frustratingly picks up just about anything and everything new to him, very quickly. He's an athlete and a teacher. A physical marvel and a scholar. We get it Luxembourger, you're gifted. Setting my ego aside, he was the perfect candidate to test out running a flow with...He also expressed a want to do yoga with me, so, all the stars aligned for this one!
My fellow quaratinees also knew that I loved yoga, and asked for a little group session as well! This, was a little daunting. I was comfortable being a student of the craft, I was comfortable running it with ma man, but a small group!?? Scarryyyyyyy. Luckily, it went pretty smoothly! I've realized that the second you forget about what people think about you, and just let your mind fall into the energies around, it's all good baby! I remember finishing that session on an absolute high! My first time running a group yoga session, and I loved it! I felt everyone's energy as they allowed themselves to surrender their minds to their bodies. It was such a powerful moment for me to see just how connected we all can be. To see how much of an impact we can all make on eachother when directed to the positive light.
Creative Minds Come Together
Ciara and I are totally using this time to feed into our creative juices! It's really fun what two people can put together when given all kinds of time to do so. She has used this time to dive into her passion for photography and videography. As someone who Loves being in front of the camera- thank you philippine genes- it's like a match made in heaven!
Over the past weeks we've been playing with different ideas for photo shoots and videos. This girl is INCREDIBLY talented with the camera and just so creative in the mind. It's safe to say that she's chosen the right passion.
My next blog will highlight some of the projects that we have worked on so STAY TUNED.
But for now, I will just leave this gem here for you to enjoy.
I've been baking a Ton lately because it makes me feel like I'm at home and well, who doesn't love a nice slice of cake to fill your midnight cravings!? Check out the video that we made showing how to properly (?) bake a carrot cake from scratch.